Not the Sharpest Crayon in the Box

So far the past two weeks have been long, hellish and have I mentioned long?  All I've pretty much done is get up (at the very last minute), go to work (often at the last minute or perhaps a smidge later, oops), stress, train students, stress some more, go home, fall into bed, repeat, repeat, repeat.

So we can safely assume that the internet and I have been a bit estranged these long, long weeks.  I feel like I've been Rip Van Winkle-ing for a hundred years and everyone has flying cars and tvs that play in their BRAINS or something. 

WHAT HAS BEEN HAPPENING, INTERNET?  I NEED TO KNOW!

I started on my neglected Google Reader tonight around 2:30am.  Ya'll, I didn't finish until almost 5am.  I now know what everyone and their dog was up to during Labor Day weekend, what Kate wore, and Zara is now available in the US. Which, I'm sorry, Kate looks darling in Zara but the stuff I saw on the website was a bit, umm, not.  Also, that model is a leeeeetle bit scary.

So two and a half hours later, my eyes are burning, tears are streaming down my face and I'm still on the computer.

Kelly Lynn.  Not the sharpest crayon in the box.


Laters.

Dear 2011, You Are Dead To Me

So, yes.  2011, I hate you with the fires of a thousand suns.  Hate, hate, hate, LOATHE ENTIRELY!

I hope everyone is having a better new year than I am because if not, I am so sorry.  I feel your pain.

So far this has occurred:

• A cold
• Slipped on the ice and banged up my hip
• Toothache that led to
• An infection
• Throwing up
• ER visit
• Dentist
• Heart attack from the cost (also: if you find my eyeballs, please return)
• PTO time taken that I was trying to save!  For, ya know, the snow.
• PTO for snow.  Dammit. 
• Car door that would not close that took all of 5 seconds to fix after taking YET MORE PTO time
• Annoying people being annoying and making me even more miserable than I was before (see above) and sticking their noses into what is totally not their business and making me incredibly pissy and no, I do not want to help you so piss off.

In conclusion, 2011, it would be totally awesome if you would be nicer to me, mmkay?

Love,
Me

The Birthday Plan

I will begin the 30 Day Shred on Sunday, October 17, 2010.  I will complete each day through thick and thin, through rain and snow and sleet and hail, in sickness and in health 'til death do us part (or something to that effect) until Tuesday, November 16, 2010.

I am hoping to have lost at least 3 lbs., hopefully more.  I am also hoping to have more energy to gt things done around the house and my job.  I am hoping that I will not be so tired all the time.

I am also hoping that I will be a size smaller!  Perhaps less boobage?  Yes, please!  Oh, to have shirts fit correctly.  And pants!  That don't bulge with the bulginess of my tummy!

Pray to all the gods above that I can stick to this!  Finding 20 minutes a day can't be that hard, right?  I just need to cut out one half-hour show block of time.

Please don't let me fail at this like everything else!

October = Love

I hope that everyone out there in internet-land is having the best October ever.

'Cause I sure am!

I absolutely love this time of year!  The weather has finally evened off into the 50-60 degree range which is wonderful as I will not die of heat stroke as I wear basically winter clothes all year round.  My office is an iceberg 364 days of the year with one day reserved for when you are bundled up for ARCTIC SURVIVAL and the furnace will malfunction and roast you to death.

True story.

In other October awesomeness, my landlord finally ripped out all the ugly bushes in front of the house!  I can see out of my kitchen window again! 

I came home from work on Tuesday night and pulled into the driveway and just sat there for a minute looking at the house.  I knew something was different but it didn't register until suddenly I figured out that I could see the whole house.  Amazing!  It suddenly looked a lot bigger (from the outside).

So while I am sad that the wildlife has been evicted from the front bushes, I am extremely pleased.  I will not be pleased if he tries to put anything back except for lilac bushes.  Can you imagine standing with your kitchen window open as you do the dishes while a gentle breeze brings in the wonderful lilac scent?  Bliss.

Going shopping this weekend!  So excited.  I'm hoping to get some new clothes or maybe some shoes or maybe a coat or maybe, well, you get the idea.

So shopping and then supper at Perkins.  Can't wait.

And I think I'll stop the rambling here.


Laters.

Delurk?

So I was checking my stats and I see that I have people who have read my blog.

!!!

!!!

Cool!

I was wondering if everyone could leave me just a quick comment on where they are from ('cause I'm nosy like that) or maybe something they would like me to post about ('cause I'm running out of ideas) or maybe just how awesome you think I am ('cause I am needy and also delusional).

If you have a blog, I will totally visit and delurk as well!


Thanks a bunch, people!

Laters.


(Please let there be at least one comment or else I will feel like a dork.  T_T)

My Weekend is Full

So, Saturday we're taking clothes to Mom's friend in the hospital in Sioux City, Sunday we're going to the Sorcerer's Apprentice and Monday (Mom's birthday!) we are back in Sioux City for Mom's appointment with the neurologist.

Can we say busy?

Today I am going to, or rather attempt, vacuuming the whole apartment, mopping the kitchen and bath, taking out the garbage, cleaning out the fridge (protective gear needed) and washing the dishes from the fridge.

Hopefully I can talk my mom out of staying over on Saturday so I can get the rest of the cleaning done that I may or may not have slacked off on this week. 

These include but are not limited to: sheets to be washed, towels to be washed, comforters to take to laundromat, bathroom cleaned, kitchen curtains need to be hemmed, washed, ironed and re-hung 4 inches higher (umm, learn how to iron), change the kitty litter(!) and rearranging some cabinets in the kitchen.

Lofty goals I'm afraid.


Laters.

Seriously?

Yesterday, while at Wal-mart getting the necessities in life (chocolate milk and peanut butter and fudge cookies), I stumbled upon a never before seen part of the store (mostly because the store is being remodeled and nothing, nothing is where it is supposed to be).  I found myself in the fitness aisle and they had exercise DVDs for $9 each.  $9.  I couldn't pass that up so I bought two, Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred and The Biggest Loser Workout Cardio Mix.

Yes, I'm fairly certain that I am sick.  Especially as I actually plan on trying them.

I've been thinking about exercising for awhile now but it really hit me in February.  February is when we get a physical for our health insurance at work.  They take your pulse, blood pressure, weigh, measure and bleed you to death take a vial or two of blood.  Then they give you a little glossy card with all the above information (including a wonderful BMI chart) and send your blood back to the vampires lab so they can run tests.

I hate that glossy little card.  For the past two years, I have been listed as obese.  Okay, I wear a size 12.  And I am obese. 

So, I have decided that I am going to exercise so that next year I can tell that little card where to go be friends with the little card.  I will be starting the 30 Day Shred tomorrow (Tomorrow?  Really?  Are you sure?  Yes, Kelly tomorrow.  No excuses.)

I'll let you know how it goes tomorrow.  If, ya know, I'm still alive.


Laters.

Feeling a little sick ...

... that I wasted all that money.

I just paid back two credit cards at $404.76 and $419.96 respectively. I have not used either of these cards for almost 2 years because they were maxed out. And now, they have a balance of $0.

I feel like such a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. 




Laters.

The Results Are In ...

I HAZ MONEEZ!


I did my taxes and am getting a nice fat check from the government.  Life is sweet.

I will be using the money to pay off two credit cards (about $800 total) and using the leftovers to to pick up some much needed items (such as JEANS which I have not bought since COLLEGE) and I am trying very hard to make sure that I am not frivolously throwing my money away. 

Sooo, I'm not getting the kitties spayed.  And no, I don't think that spaying my cats is a frivolous thing.  It's just too cold!  I kept telling myself that just as soon as I got my refund, off to the vet we would go.  But I didn't figure that we would be in the middle of the Year of the Blizzard(s) and have 50 gazillion tons of snow dumped on us.  So the kittos and I are going to wait until Spring to venture out, probably by boat after all this snow melts.  If, ya know, we actually have Spring this year.

Anyhoo, I'm trying to make up a master list of stuff I NEED.  And trying to justify it, of course.  (I have a weird vision of myself as Rebecca from Confessions of a Shopaholic when she is justifying buying gloves because SHE HAS HANDS!)



Laters.